Beautiful Day

Well everyone I have great news.  I got a job and so did my Mom!!!  After weeks of hunting and countless apps I have finally landed a job as a cashier at Sam's Club... and same with my Mom lol.  Yeah a little funny Mother, Daughter working for the same place doing the same thing.  Its really a blessing though.   Not exactly a dream job but its great for us.  Filled out the application last night, interviewed this morning, and walked out with a job.  Its a HUGE relief knowing we will both have a source of income.  The pay is actually really good and they also have pretty decent benefits. Hoping they are going to give us full-time right away but we will see.

So I treated my Mom and Sister to lunch to celebrate, then we had to go pay the cellphone bill which is never any fun. Now we are just home relaxing.  I guess that is all that I really have to write about today lol.  I was just so excited I wanted to share the great news with everyone else.  =)  Oh also some of you may notice that I have deleted all of my old post.  I wasn't sure at first on whether or not I was going to, but in the end its what I wanted.  While the past I know will always be a part of me this is a fresh start for my family and I.  Even though most of the post were happy post I still think a clean slate is what I need.

So I hope you all had an amazing Tuesday.

-Nadine

Dust Bunnies and The Haunting

So today my Mom and I spent the day cleaning.  Staying with our friend Jim and his roommate Scott.... well we moved into a bachelor pad lets put it that way.  Really its is not as bad as you would think.  In fact on first glance the apartment looks very tidy.  Its all those little things like.... dusting that has been neglected for a while.  So we swept, mopped, dusted, scrubbed the bathroom.  Sweeping was a bit of a challenge after moving pieces of furniture I felt like I spent most of my time chasing around dust bunnies that refused to go into the dust pan.  I swear they were running from me!  We can confidently say now though that the apartment is now very clean.  We made lemon pepper marinaded chicken with garlic and herb noddles for dinner and then spent the evening relaxing.

Oh a little random note at the moment I am listening to San Andreas Fault by Natalie Merchant.  Perfect song in my opinion to just dim the lights maybe even light some candles and just sway to the music to.  If only I had a room... and candles I would do just that.

I talked to my Mom yesterday about her Ganesh tattoo and she has decided against it.  I can understand her reasons why which are a bit personal.  I think I might still work on a drawing of it though.  Lately thanks to pinterest lol I have been more in the mood to draw something.... magical.  I just created two new boards "Down the Rabbit Hole" and "Neverland".  For those of you who can't guess one is an Alice in Wonderland theme and the other Peter Pan.  Both have put me in the mood to draw something along those themes.  Oh the possibilities.  Maybe that is how I will spend my Monday who knows.

I also think I am going to start a new thing here on the blog.  Friday Favorites or Friday Finds one of the two.  I have seen a few other people doing it and I like the idea.  Will be a way for me to share all the neat little things I come by through out my net surfing of the week.  Images, songs, post, blogs, stories, ect...  Plus it gives me something to write about and a fun little activity to look forward to.

One things I can't wait til Friday to share though is Magaly Guerrero's (from the blog Pegan Culture) story "The Haunting".  I loved it!  Its not like anything I have ever read before, very original, dark, and sexy.  I couldn't stop reading until I had finished.  By the time I finished "Out of the Fire" Part 6 of the story I was on the edge of my seat, left craving more and still can't get over it.  I would recommend it to anyone.  If you are interested in reading it here is the link. http://www.magalyguerrero.com/p/pre-chaos_08.html I hope that anyone who decides to read it enjoys it as much as I do.

Well that is it for today.  I hope that you all had a wonderful Sunday to end or start your week.  =)  I have to get going for now though since a very handsome man who currently holds my affection is calling.

-Nadine

Celtic Magic

By the fern brake, deep and shady,

There I met an elfin lady.

Dressed in cobweb silk and flowers,

There she whiled away the hours,

Waiting until dark.

On the soft green moss beside her,

Lay a baby wrapped in eider.

Skin so fair and hair like midnight,

The lady watched the coming twilight,

Waiting till 'twas dark.

Silently, I sat beside her,

Hoping for some words to gather

In my numb and startled mind.

Said the lady, "You're most kind

to wait with me till dark."

"Are you lost?" I asked lady.

"Is this your home, this fern brake shady?

Will others come by star and Moon?"

She only smiled, began to croon

To the elfin child.

The baby slept.  The lady told me

Deep magic of the Earth and Sea.

Spells she whispered, strong and old.

"Use them well," she said. "Be bold

When spelling in the night."

"Can I work these?" The lady smiled,

Gathered up her sleeping child.

"Oh yes," she answered, "Tis a boon

For waiting with me till the Moon

Slips up the sky."

Thinking deep, I sat beside her,

Keeping watch. I heard the rider

Coming through the fern brake shady.

"Are you there, my lovely lady?"

Called an elfin voice.

An elfin lord, his clothes all viney,

Armed with sword and dagger shiny,

Rode his horse into the fern brake.

Then my heart began to quake

On seeing his dark eyes.

Twilight gathered; birds were still.

The Moon came up above the hill.

Suddenly I felt alone.

"Have no fear, for you have sown

Good friendship."

The lady smiled and raised her hand.

Upon her brow a shining band

Glistened by the light of the Moon.

"Would you too give forth a boon?"

She asked her lord.

"For here is a friend, a watcher bold."

"But they are enemies of old,"

The elf lord answered.

"No," she said,

"But guarded us in this fern bed."

He smiled.

"So there are some who wish us well."

His voice was like a distant bell.

A ring he took from off his hand.

"This will tune you to the land

and magic."

Its stone was pale, just like the Moon.

The air was filled with eldritch tune,

As they mounted, lord and lady,

Rode off through the fern brake shady.

I stood alone.

People say elves are not there.

But I have heard their voices fair,

When I sit down in the brake.

Magic spells I've learned to make

All from the lady.

Elf lord's ring is on my hand

To help with magic from the land.

Sometimes I talk with lord and lady

In the fern brake, deep and shady,

Secretly.

Is there magic?  For me 'tis so.

For when the sun is sinking low,

I feel Earth's power within my heart

And know that I shall never part

From the lord and lady.

     

                           "Elves" -D.J. Conway

So that is the poem that opens D.J. Conway's book "Celtic Magic" and I thought I would share it with all of you.  (Warning spoiler alerts from this point on.)  So far I am not that far into the book and I just decided to start reading it from the beginning again.  The first chapter is The Celts/Druid history lesson.  I have to admit it was a little hard to focus on it and really absorb what was being said instead of just speed reading through it.  Talked a bit about how the Celtic people were one of the few races to give their goddesses "equal footing with their gods."  Mentioned a little bit about plant and herb magic.  (need to look into some books on that)  So learning about them is a key factor as well as seeking certain stones is important.  How our emotions are important in spell work and that certain numbers have important meaning.  "3, 5, 7, and 9" which is something I still don't really know all that much about in fact this is the first time I have heard mention of numbers like this. Talked a little bit about the Elements (Fire, Earth, Air, and Water)  and ended the chapter with a small mention of Moon phases.  This chapter did contain more than just that but I didn't want to rewrite the whole book just things that I remember that struck me.  

Later on it went on to talk about two different forms of meditation.  One being to light a candle and set it on a table in front of you, sit comfortably and to look at the flame.  It mentioned that staring at the blue at the base of the flame is easiest on the eyes and not to stare blink when needed.  After a few minutes close your eyes and look for the flame, see how long you can hold the mental image before your conscious mind begins to intrude.  

I know when I started this blog somewhere I once talked about how I have a really hard time with meditation.  My mind is constantly at 100 mph and goes in constant circles.  One of the reasons it takes me forever to fall asleep at night.  So focusing and not letting my thoughts go off and run wild is a bit of a challenge for me.  

The second exercise was to focus on a picture instead of the flame.  It mentioned that Tarot cards are a nice tool for this particular exercise and that once you can hang on to the image for a comfortable amount of time without interruption to focus on the image and try to create movement.

 So I have my work cut out for me and I haven't even  made it to chapter 4 which is Magical Elements.  While I really want to continue reading I haven't decided whether or not I will yet.  Part of me wants to say that there is little point in it until I have successfully managed to get comfortable with meditation even if it is using a different exercise than the two give here.  Another part of me says there is no harm in continuing to read.  Is it like a Math textbook in high school?  If you move on from a chapter before you have really accomplished the material will you be totally lost from that point on?

(end of spoiler)

Anyways sorry about the little run on with the book there.  I am just a bit excited about it.  So far I am liking it though a part of me feels like there is probably something better and more as to what I am looking for than this.  (what I am looking for exactly I have no idea)  Its just written a little.... funny.  If that makes any sense at all which I doubt.  I find that I sometimes have to read a single sentence a few times over before continuing.  So I would love to hear anyone else's thoughts/opinions on the book if you have read it.  Or if any of you have any suggestions as to different books to look into I am very interested.  

Today was a pretty mellow day.  We went to visit Jim's (friend we are staying with) parents.  Caitlin went swimming with his Mom while Jim, Mom and I sat with his Dad and just chit chatted.  Had a long conversation about books and how many authors have done an amazing job with creating new worlds, and cultures.  Started with talking about Harry Potter and how amazing it is that J.K. Rowling could create this alternate life along with society today.  Which then led to Tolkien, George R.R. Martin, ect...

Afterwards we came home had pizza bread for dinner and now here I sit writing about it all. =P  I am really sorry if my post are a bit boring with my rants on my average life.  I do hope to have more interesting things to write about one day.  This is just a nice relaxing outlet and I don't want my writing to fall to the background and disappear all together like last time.  

I also added a new button for those who haven't noticed to my new twitter account.  I have to admit I was never really big on the idea of tweeting until I realized that sometimes I just have thoughts I would like to share that are just too short for blogging and often forgotten by the time I sit down to write.  Like how Sharon's (from Plumrose Lane) son Jesse has entered a songwriter contest for CD Baby.  I was able to spread the word by tweeting about it.  If any of you are interested in hearing the song I added the music player thingy above. "Sound of a Smirk"  Couldn't figure out how to get it to actually work in the actual post but I figured this way its up for a while for people who stop by and visit.  Go ahead and listen I really liked it and if you agree go ahead and just click the little vote button.  =) Tweeting is also a nice way to share my art and tweet when I have written a new post for the blog.  Speaking of which I have added three new drawings to my deviant account if anyone wants to check them out.

Well I think that is all for now.... Long post yikes....

Hope you all are having a great weekend.

-Nadine

Busy Friday

Well I feel like today was pretty productive.  Woke up this morning to get dressed and immediately head out with the family. (Mom, Caitlin, and our friend Jim.)  First stop was to the bank so I could cash a check.  Which took a ridiculously long time.  A Teller tried to tell me that I couldn't cash the check there since I did not have a bank account with them even though it was a check for their bank.  Silly Teller must have forgotten that they do in fact cash checks from their bank it just has to be verified, two forms of ID provided and fingerprinted, but I reminded her. ;) After getting my check cashed we had to go to Fedex/Kinkos and get a few copies made for some DES info.  Tons of fun.  Afterwards we treated ourselves to a lunch at Dennys.  After that we went to go check out the house we should be moving into in roughly a little over a month. Lets just say we are all pretty excited.  Then after coming home and relaxing for a little while.  A.K.A. Me messing around on the computer tweaking the blog here and there, creating a twitter, and catching up on some of the blogs I follow, I took my little sister out to the pool.  She had a blast and was excited when I pulled out the floaty and started to blow it up for her.  I think I will take her again tomorrow either early in the morning or sometime in the evening and go swimming with her since I didn't today, we will see.  So anyways few other little tid-bits I have started to read two new books.  Well not really new have had both for a while but just started reading them.  A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin and Celtic Magic by D.J. Conway.  If anyone has any comments on either I am all ears.  A Game of Thrones so far is very good my Mom started reading them way back when and after seeing a few episodes of the new TV show I decided to steal her book and read the first one.  Very dark as far as I can tell, and a bunch of different characters to follow.  Sometimes I forget about certain characters until they suddenly start a new chapter with them.  That is how the books are formatted each chapter is a different character.  Celtic Magic I haven't gotten too far into yet but I bought it at Bookmens and am ready to just snuggle down and really read it so I can give my thoughts on it here.  I will also be starting two new art projects hopefully soon.  One I will be working on

probably for a while is a tattoo design for my Mom of the Ganesha.  I am pretty nervous and excited about it all at the same time.  So much detail but I love it, I also need to study up on exactly what the Ganesh is and what each item means.  So any comments there would be more than welcomed because I don't know all too much about it.  I will probably post updates of the work in progress not only of the drawing but also what I learn about it, here so I can hopefully get some constructive criticism and helpful ideas.  The other project is a tattoo design for myself.  I haven't the slightest clue what it is going to be though.  Something that in its own way for me symbolize staying strong and positive through hard times, finding the beauty in life everywhere, love and family.  Not sure how exactly I am going to do this but I am determined.  Well that is about it for right now.  I hope you all had a fantastic Friday and will have fun this weekend.

 -Nadine

Late night note...

Well everyone I have re-vamped the blog.  What do you think?  I know its a little...... raw.  But well its the best I can do with the comp and tools that I have.  Hopefully one day soon I will be able to get some pretties from Plumerose Lane.  If you haven't checked out their blog I really recommend it.  I have a button to their page on the right underneath favorites.  Anyways I am pretty excited about the new look.  Definitely more cheerful than the dark purples I had going on before.  Updated all my buttons and even added a few new ones that I hope you guys will check out.  Like the one to my Pinterest account.  I spend way to much time on that site. =P  I also updated my pages, I was considering adding another for my drawings but I figured since I had a button linked to my deviant account that it wasn't really necessary.  Well it is 2 in the morning here right now so I have spent entirely way to much time re-designing the blog.  But I am glad with the results.  Off to bed now.  I hope you all had a great Thursday.  Happy Dreaming.

-Nadine

4th of July

Well I hope that all of you had a wonderful 4th yesterday.  We spent our day with friends playing a game, eating turkey burgers, and enjoying each other company.  We didn't actually go to watch any fireworks since all of us were pretty pooped by the end of the day though I did take my little sister down to the pool so she could swim for a while.  Unfortunately she is scared of fireworks still (she always has been) so it wasn't that long at the pool before she said she wanted to go back inside because so many people we lighting off fireworks.  The game we played took most of the day which was pretty crazy.  Dawn Patrol, I have never played it before and it was definitely a new experience.  I had fun but after about four hours I started taking unnecessary risk just so my plane would get shot out of the sky.  Lol I had a ton of fun don't get me wrong, just after a while I was ready for the game to be over.  The game itself kinda reminded me of Dungeons and Dragons to be honest.  Only you are like a pilot and flying a plane and you are trying to pretty much shoot each other out of the sky.  A lot of the game depended on the luck of the dice.  What not.  A LOT of rules and such.  Anyways so that is what I did yesterday.  Things so far are going good.  A little crowded where we are staying right now but happy to have a roof over our heads and friends to be with in such hard times.  Hope that you all have a wonderful Thursday. =)

-Nadine

Update

Well just to make sure that I get back into writing I figured I should give a little update.  Plus right now there are just a few thing that I need to get out.  While I do have people that I can talk to I haven't been able to contact any of them yet.  My Mom has left my Step Dad.  While it is a very sad event I think it is something that is long overdue.  While I know they once loved each other with how things have been going for.... well over a year now its better this way.  I am not going to go into a long personal story of all the reasons why this is a good thing.  I just agree with them separating and I think it is the best for everyone even if others can't see it.  The thing that has been grating against my nerves and wearing me down the last week though was I knew that my Mom was leaving him the entire time.  We had talked about it a week ago and made all the arrangements.  It made our home feel more like a prison than anything though.  All I wanted to do was leave get away from the tension that hung thick in the air because we all knew what was going to happen.  Even Paul my Step Dad could tell something was going on even though my Mom had not told him.  So today we finally left.  Packing up and leaving was what finally snapped my nerves though.  While loading the bags and boxes it was like I had become a robot and was working on auto pilot.  "Get it done fast so we can leave" was about the only thought that ran through my head the whole time.  I thought I would start to feel better once we were on the road.  But having my baby sister in the car with me torn by the situation which we all knew she would be just seemed to cut into me more.  I was was only a year older than her when my parents divorced and despite probably knowing exactly what she is going through all words escaped me.  I had no idea what I could say to comfort her other than it was ok to cry, and to be angry.  That we all still loved her just the same.  Most of the ride was silent other than the music I had playing and a part of me felt like I was failing as her older sister not being able to think of a single thing to say to her.  It's hard when I think that this is the best for 'everyone' but especially her and I can't explain why to her.  Not only is she too young being only 8 but I don't want to in anyway bad mouth her Father in front of her.  I don't think it is constructive in any way, it is her Father, and I know that she loves him and that he loves her.  So anyways I think I will end that rant there though I could go on forever.... Now while our Mom is out with a friend I am sitting by the pool watching my Sister swim and blissfully for the moment being a care free 8 year old.  So my Mom, Sister and I have relocated finally from the small town we all felt trapped in.  At the moment I am not going to say where and I wish it could have been a better situation.  I have faith that things are going to turn out alright though and that things will start looking up for ALL of us.  I hope that you all had a wonderful Monday.  Again any good energy and vibes sent our way would be greatly appreciated.

-Nadine